The ap (auto pilot) command has a deceptive name. It doesn't
actually place the computer on auto pilot. The ap command reads
and attempts to perform the commands you want to do. For example,
thinking "I really wish I had a backup copy of the tanana image."
will cause ap to input
cp tanana.* tanana_bak.*
to the Unix shell. Preceding a thought with "ignore" will cause
ap to ignore your next thought. Although, with enough
practice, the ap command can be a significant time saver, there
are a few unresolved problems with this command.
Hopefully you have realized by now that this command really
- I often change my mind while in the thinking process. In the previous
example I may have decided later that I wanted to call the backup copy
something else. No big deal here, ap just changes the
filename but it isn't the most efficient use of computer resources.
- All of the commands are echoed to the screen so that you
know exactly what is going on. This is great as long as you remember
to think "ignore" before you read each command. If you forget,
the command will be executed again. This will continue until you
remember to include the "ignore" flag or you think, "What is going
on here?" which will cause the man pages for the particular command
you are repeating to be displayed.
- The ap command reads the strongest mind waves (known as
grey waves) that it finds. If you have weak grey waves or
your monitor is closer to someone else in your
office, ap may listen to someone else's mind instead of
yours. Also, walls do not provide insulation from grey waves,
so if your monitor
is near a wall, be prepared for some grey waves from minds on the
other side of the wall to occasionally sneak in.
- As you probably know, humans (you included) don't use their brains to
their highest potential. In fact, many believe that we use as little
as 5% of our brain's capacity. The problem here is that ap
is only able to read around 80% of your mind. Unfortunately,
many people use the 5% of their mind that ap can't read.
When ap is called it scans your mind for activity, if none
is found it prints the following cryptic error message:
ap: Command not found.
This indicates that it couldn't find a command in your head.
Don't worry, this doesn't mean that you aren't thinking,
it just means that you use the part of your brain that
ap can't access.
© 1993-1998 Christopher C. Taylor